Post by vhaeraun on Aug 4, 2005 9:39:05 GMT -5
A lady's sick of her husband's drinking, so she decides to teach him a lesson. She dresses up like Satan, and when her husband walks in from being out all night, she jumps out from behind the sofa and screams. He says, "You don't scare me. I'm married to your sister."
A couple comes up to a wishing well. The guy leans over, makes a wish, and throws in a penny. His wife decides to make a wish, too, but she leans over too far, falls into the well, and drowns. The guy says, "WOW...it really works."
Little Ashley and his friend Beaufort went to the movies and, before the show, headed to the bathroom to relieve themselves. Ashley urinated, then washed his hands; much to his surprise, Beaufort did just the opposite. "Hey," said Ashley, "smart boys wash after they pee." Holding his head back proudly, young Beaufort corrected, "Smart boys learn not to pee on their hands."
One day, three nuns were talking while enjoying their cups of tea, when one of the nuns leaned towards the other two and whispered, "I'm in such a dilemma, sisters, and I don't know what to do. Maybe you can help me. When I was cleaning the Father's room, I found a box of condoms in his dresser drawer, and now I don't know whether or not to tell Bishop. What do you think I should do?"
"Oh my word," said the second nun. "I must have found the same box of condoms when I cleaned his room last week! Well, I don't know if you should tell the Bishop or not but do you know what I did? I poked a hole in the end of each and everyone of them."
Both nuns heard a gasp, turned and saw that the third nun had fainted.
A couple comes up to a wishing well. The guy leans over, makes a wish, and throws in a penny. His wife decides to make a wish, too, but she leans over too far, falls into the well, and drowns. The guy says, "WOW...it really works."
Little Ashley and his friend Beaufort went to the movies and, before the show, headed to the bathroom to relieve themselves. Ashley urinated, then washed his hands; much to his surprise, Beaufort did just the opposite. "Hey," said Ashley, "smart boys wash after they pee." Holding his head back proudly, young Beaufort corrected, "Smart boys learn not to pee on their hands."
One day, three nuns were talking while enjoying their cups of tea, when one of the nuns leaned towards the other two and whispered, "I'm in such a dilemma, sisters, and I don't know what to do. Maybe you can help me. When I was cleaning the Father's room, I found a box of condoms in his dresser drawer, and now I don't know whether or not to tell Bishop. What do you think I should do?"
"Oh my word," said the second nun. "I must have found the same box of condoms when I cleaned his room last week! Well, I don't know if you should tell the Bishop or not but do you know what I did? I poked a hole in the end of each and everyone of them."
Both nuns heard a gasp, turned and saw that the third nun had fainted.